THE CENTRAL PA GAZELLE

A look at what isn't making news across the midstate

Posts Tagged ‘education

School District Removes Fart-Lighting From Science Curriculum After Fireball Incident

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fireball_1The Carlisle Area School Board voted last night to forbid teachers from lighting farts after last week’s flatulence fireball incident at Wilson Middle School. Read the rest of this entry »

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Written by centralpagazelle

December 7, 2012 at 9:30 am

Dingell-Baehre Wedding Planned

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(HARRISBURG) – Former Harrisburg Area Community College President Edna Baehre has announced plans to wed Congressman John Dingell of Michigan. Read the rest of this entry »

Written by centralpagazelle

September 23, 2010 at 8:25 pm

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Jesus Rises From The Dead, School Cancelled Monday

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(Jerusalem) — Jesus Christ again rose from the dead today, causing midstate school districts to cancel Monday classes and Biblical scholars to speculate as to why He chose this year to make a big return. Read the rest of this entry »

Written by centralpagazelle

April 4, 2010 at 7:00 am

Zahorchak Achieves ‘Adequate Yearly Progress’ In The Sack

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(HARRISBURG) – The wife of Pennsylvania Education Secretary Gerald Zahorchak announced today that her husband is meeting more benchmarks in bed than he was one year ago. Read the rest of this entry »

Written by centralpagazelle

August 29, 2007 at 8:44 pm

PHEAA Chief: Loans Cut From Budget

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(HARRISBURG) – The head of the Pennsylvania Higher Education Assistance Agency today conceded that PHEAA actually stopped awarding college loans three years ago. Read the rest of this entry »

Written by centralpagazelle

August 23, 2007 at 9:53 pm

Hample Stepping Down To Spend More Time With Her Money

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(HARRISBURG) – State System of Higher Education Chancellor Judy Hample said her recent decision to resign her post is rooted in a desire to spend more time spending money. Read the rest of this entry »

Written by centralpagazelle

July 5, 2007 at 8:50 pm

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